My first attempt at a villanelle. I don't know if it's good or bad, but that doesn't matter because I have written something new and fresh, which I hadn't written before.


Of Sweden

I'm thinking of Sweden in the rain
a strange theatre on the pier: a trail
of fear and love, of memory and pain.

The fear should be of going bleak insane.
the love should be like a fairytale,
I'm thinking of Sweden in the rain.

The loneliness is harder to explain--
an empty place inside me where I fail.
of fear and love, of memory and pain.

I think of a woman and a skein
of truths disguised as lies. She wore a veil.
I'm thinking of Sweden in the rain.

The shapes repeat like some bizarre refrain
and there's a manuscript, a face, and there' a grail
of fear and love, of memory and pain.

The wizard waves his hand and we turn pale.
tells us sad truths, but all to no avail.
I'm thinking of Sweden in the rain.

Of fear and love, of memory and pain.
Ashe





Poetry by Ashe The PoetBay support member heart!
Read 146 times
Written on 2018-05-16 at 14:22

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tahir baban
I enjoyed this beautiful poem and read it all several times

Tahir Baban
2018-05-30


Ivan R
What a beautiful poem, it just amazes the reader, (me ;).
This is what good poetry is about; it makes the reader feel joy from words. Amazing. Just great.
2018-05-21


Jamsbo Rockda The PoetBay support member heart!
I didn't know that is what it is called. Ignorant little me. But i enjoyed this very much. Quite mysterious. I wonder what the fairy-tale is?
2018-05-18


Bibek
I am in love with this villanelle. :)

Bibek
2018-05-18


one trick pony The PoetBay support member heart!
I love this poem. Perhaps the constraint of the form was counter-intuitively liberating. It is as if you wrote something that couldn't be written any other way, that these words have been waiting within for the proper structure to come out, that you couldn't have expressed yourself in this way, any other way.

I'm sorry if this is a jumbled comment. I mean it as praise. This poem was meant to be, it feels inevitable, and graceful, and rich.
2018-05-18


Thomas DeFreitas The PoetBay support member heart!
I always rejoice inwardly when I see a villanelle. And this particular villanelle enthralls me happily! Excellent work.
2018-05-16