Numb

Between the pills and your withdrawal,
Almost all the drama that afflicted me
Two years ago has ebbed away. The
Pendulum which swung insanely from
The ecstasy I felt when I could spend
Some time with you to when I sat at
Home and wondered whether I should
Kill myself has lost momentum. Gravity,
Or pills, or your decision to break free
Of me, have stopped its swinging. Now,
It barely moves at all. I sit here numb.
I don't believe I'll ever be with you again.
I also have convinced myself that I should
Go on with my life. In some ways, that's
A bitter joke, as my heart dies and I will
Follow. I'm not apt to live that long.
I wish you well to some extent. I can't
Say that I really care. I wish I saw some
Point to living, but I don't. I never
Have, but these drugs clap me on
The back, like some old pervert priest,
Who says, "Just play along. You'll be
Okay, " as his hands fumble for my
Zipper. I don't care. I want to sleep.
The zeal I knew, the depths of sorrow,
Both have ebbed away.



Poetry by Lawrence Beck The PoetBay support member heart!
Read 88 times
Written on 2017-05-08 at 01:23

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