Inner battles

Not hungry

Only a little longer
I can stop, I am just not ready
It isn't like before.
I have an end point and it will be better.
I promise

Only a little longer
Ill count it up and cut it off
I feel fine, so I must be fine
No one can even notice anyway

Only a little longer
I think its starting to work now
A little less and I'll be perfect
I wish it would show more
I think i had too much today

Only a little longer
If I eat now then i can have water until dinner
Ill stay busy, I am not even hungry
My shirts don't fit well yet.
Just another pound

Only a little longer
Im tired, If I'm going to be lazy
I don't need as much.
Im not THAT hungry
I not getting smaller
Why am I still like this

Only a little longer
That guy in line was staring
He can see the lumps in my clothing
He must think I'm disgusting
Of course he does.

Only a little longer
Ill cut this apple in half
Thats 30 now 30 later
If I'm hungry, I might not need it.
I won't need it

Only a little longer
Im too tired, if I stay a sleep
I wont eat, my head hurts anyway
When I lay flat you can see my ribs
I am starting to look a little thinner

Only a little longer
Im fine, you cant make me eat
I've lost 25 pounds i swear
The water weight
Makes me look bloated
Thats all, ill just drink less

If I eat, Ill gain it all back
I feel heavier just thinking about it
My mind won't stop
I can't stop
I'm not hungry
I'm not hungry
I'm not.

Poetry by ashley honig
Read 484 times
Written on 2016-12-11 at 18:09

Tags Anorexia  Hunger  Skinny 

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Kathy Lockhart The PoetBay support member heart!
This is very powerful and extremely profound! You've spoke loudly and the world can hear you. I heard your whispers when they were that first thought many years ago. I can only imagine that thought was whispered into your ear...

ashley honig
This is an older poem, I have two girls of my own now and I worry about them ever feeling this way. I felt like it was time I could post it in honor of my struggles and to remind me to always teach my girls they are perfect the way they are.

Lawrence Beck The PoetBay support member heart!
As the father of a girl who suffered from anorexia, this poem makes me very sad. Eat. The world, the people who matter, will value you as you are.