July 31, 2020.

the thing about journals

when i was a teenager i'd always say i wanted to document my life

so every year almost, i'd buy a new journal or a notebook with spiral spine

i'd pick up a pen and in a few days i'd lose it and my drive to write

and then months would pass and i'd say it's different this time


but the thing about journals is that they don't leave you high and dry

the thing about journals is that they'll never leave your side

when you're ready to cry and you're ready to come out of hiding and stop lying

that journal will welcome you with understanding and pride


i would build a personality for my journals and though i always felt safe

even some days i would write lie after lie and put on a brave face

because this was someone who listened and cared, someone who always was there

and disappointment seemed like betrayal after all it's effort-- I didn't prevail 


the thing about journals is they lend you an ear

they're unbiased and uncertain and that makes them real

but my patterns ring true and i'd never follow through

so now i'm left with half empty journals and friends I no longer want to use





Poetry by aidan haskel
Read 219 times
Written on 2020-07-31 at 23:13

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