August 30, 2022.
defensive walls ten foot high
but riddled with convenient holes that say,
"come in, please try"
I tell myself it is manipulative
my emotions and my needs
every handwritten, scented letter and small gift
- just so they won't leave
- but wanting friends is not evil
I am not the monster I paint myself to be
just a timid child who is eager for company
one who cuts out my heart and apologizes for bleeding
when the noise in my mind allows me to breathe,
I know these aren't favors in exchange for empathy
but I was never good at making friends
abandonment had placed this insecurity that I'm undeserving
so why else would they linger
what benefits do I provide
I'm shifty sand that won't allow stability
in my own little life
Poetry by aidan haskel
Read 169 times
Written on 2022-08-30 at 08:49
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autophobia
an open book used to being shusheddefensive walls ten foot high
but riddled with convenient holes that say,
"come in, please try"
I tell myself it is manipulative
my emotions and my needs
every handwritten, scented letter and small gift
- just so they won't leave
- but wanting friends is not evil
I am not the monster I paint myself to be
just a timid child who is eager for company
one who cuts out my heart and apologizes for bleeding
when the noise in my mind allows me to breathe,
I know these aren't favors in exchange for empathy
but I was never good at making friends
abandonment had placed this insecurity that I'm undeserving
so why else would they linger
what benefits do I provide
I'm shifty sand that won't allow stability
in my own little life
Poetry by aidan haskel
Read 169 times
Written on 2022-08-30 at 08:49
Save as a bookmark (requires login) Write a comment (requires login) Send as email (requires login) Print text
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