Fighting and screamin...
going threw my head....
I shut my door and crawl in bead...
trying to ignore it,
but it jus keeps gettin louder..
burying my head into my pillow
holding the tears from eyes....
but i cant its to hard
i start to cry
for my mom and dad... why? why?
that was 8 years ago....
but still i think....
was it becasue of me that things went that way..
as i lay in bed know things may not get better...
my dad is in iraq and things growing worse....
i know it wasn't my fault he left...
but i still cant help crying some nights on account of whats dealt....
i know this isn't helping..
i need to move on...
but that one night has left me crying...
deep inside...

times are going good then when i come home
i only see my mom.... and
well theres no one else for show....
dad you know i miss you so.....
so when you come home from iraq please dad
please don't let go.....

when i see you happy, because of don
that feels good but some one has gone..
don is my stepdad and i know he loves me too....
but hes not my dad and he wont ever be...
hes jus don and thats it to me...

To both of you.....
i love you both very dearly
and im glad that you are both happy..
but dad i miss u
its not like i can see you everyday
you live like 1000 miles away
when u get home dad im coming to see you
cuz dad i miss you and i love you so...
mom i know ur happy but im not that way...
thas why i took up poetry to help get away..
this is my own place no matter how bad...
it helps me release...

outside im a very happy kid...
but inside thas not it tho.
im very depressed and sad i jus don't let it show...
some times i cry to help myself sleep...
cuz that one night when screaming made me weep.
i always remember that one dark dark night..
and will always think i should've stopped the fight

Poetry by chris helus
Read 566 times
Written on 2006-12-24 at 07:42

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hey chris,
I know how you felt/feel......my parents been apart for 10 almost 11 yrs...im 12 almost 13....i dont remember how it feels to have my real parents together...but they didnt really love eachother...i kno have 2 step parents a wonderful step dad and a wonderful step mom....i love both of them very much.....but i always wish that my real parents where together its so hard for me...my mom is raiseing me the way i dont want to be.....i live with my real mom and step dad....my mom was never there for me when i was a baby.....it was my real dad and i wish very much i could live with him but the only way to do that is to go to court and i think about it all the time...but its just to hard to pick between parents.....but anyways....great poem!...i loved it! :D keep up the wonderful work!!

betsy Firefly
Much deep pain expreassed in this poem which gripped my heart. When parents split - it is NOT the child's fault - ever!

I'm glad you have the gift of writing things down and the courage to share..

Brooke Michelle
Hey, i hear yelling every night i know how you felt/feel.just think pain without love happiness without love thats wat i think well i g2g

your words tell of your pain ... in a gentle and deep way ... it is well written

please do not blame yourself for your parents divorce .. it is never a childs fault grown ups split ... never!!

it is hard loosing one of your parents ... not having them to relate to growing up ... and sometimes it will be harder just because .. but then again sometimes later in life there will be things you manage just because of it ....

and remember that you are you and they are them and take care of all the good stuff they have brought to you ..... in your genes an things they have done and do in your life...

take care and live safey and beautifully through the New Year ..
regards Kath

Well I enjoyed this first read of yours Chris, it has a few errors in it that need a spell checker but your poem speaks about the terror divorce causes the children of the marriage. But, that one night could have gone on for years and left you in immense misery. Be sure that you didn't cause your parents split, it just happens sometimes and if both parties are happy in the end, it is for the best.

Take care in 2007


Zoya Zaidi
This is a poignant write!
From the bottom of your heart!
And I know how you feel:
I know your pain and resentment,
Frustration and disenchantment,
I know it is hard on you,
And it is not an easy thing to do,
But you have to take life as it comes,
Because life has these ups and downs
That cannot be helped sometimes...
And Your Dad will surely come back to you,
and when he will see you all grown up,
He will be so happy for you!

(((Hugs for that heartfelt write Chris!)))

May God Bless you!
Welcome to the bay!

Yes, you can post all whatever you feel like; Bay invites every body to write openly and freely on anything that is lying heavy on your heart!
It is cathartic! So, keep writing!

Love, Zoya

A very heart felt read..I can feel your pain in this read I do!
You can not live in the past what if! I did this or that..we all have thought of what you feel..you are not alone..many feel your pain and what you have had to deal with..the one night you so write about,you had no control and wasnt your fault! that given night of that fight that is inbedded in your mind.you have to remember it wasnt you!!and you couldn't have done different..!don't blame yourself ok!!.. yes he will never be your dad and no one can ever replace..your dad!! but you can learn to live that if your stepdad loves your mom you have to know....no matter how you feel..I don't know your relationship but.there is a but!! It was out of your hands when when your parents had there fights..You could not of done different...I do hear you..it is hard but you will overcome,and know you are loved too..I ramble but your poem really got to me :)I know divorce is the hardest a child can take
as I am from a divorced family...never is it easy to see them part..YOU WILL BE OK! POETRY IS A HEALER! great release you did write...keep writing!!!! sorry for the long comment :)
hugs to you and