Time ceaseless

Never before, seemed your presence,
A norm of fate, a pleasant slip of fortune,
A true meaning with a hard realization,
Meant an everlasting, a bliss for me,
Time ceaseless, a comedy of healing,
Healing wounds like wind in the aisles,
My breathing, dreaming, an ecstasy,
Amidst fiery storms of facts, harsh reality,
And there u lie still, ever so lively,
In my dreams, my breath, my ecstatic trance,
Timeless your presence, yes with me forever,
Why still a gap, an utter nothingness in soul,
A soul so full of life, so rich in charm,
Ages ago, a moment before you came,
A just act of fate, took it all,
My faith, charm, dreams and you,

Poetry by sagi
Read 656 times
Written on 2005-07-15 at 20:12

Tags Sadness 

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awwww.man..i totaly overlooked that 'u'..plus yeah i havent actually been through poetry..iam now days though...so those nimble mistakes will disappear

StillHoppin The PoetBay support member heart!
i think this was really good... a little work on spelling/grammar as noted by others, but that's the only problem i see.


chasingtheday The PoetBay support member heart!
sorry i was really getting into that then but stopped reading as soon as i saw you had used 'u' rather than the actual word you.

i like it and the only suggestion i have would be to not end it with a comma. this is really nice.