Current Mood: tired
Current Music: "The Quiet Place" - In Flames

NOTE: 2005 09 19 02H07 EST Triolet 2 - Society Glitch _ second attempt

Society Glitch

Innocence without viable resource,
But the eyes of her population,
Disturbed by her life's course,
Move along a familiar discourse.

Giving a child no other recourse,
Pushing further into desperation.
Innocence without viable resource,
But the eyes of her population...

Words by Moods The PoetBay support member heart!
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Written on 2005-09-24 at 14:48

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Commentally Ill
well this is bright and chirpy, the whole thing smacks of delight :)

ok, not really, what does a smartass say to this? not much. another try:

for a second attempt, it looks more like a third? (no, even as i type it i know that sounds shitty.) hell with it then, i'll have to go the serious route:

i do so very like it... which has a lot to do with why i'm speechless ;) impressive, my talented friend....


i can't write one of these for the life of me and have it come out decent. you however, seem like a cat stretching its body into a natural shape - form. and you say you are not a poet! could've fooled me, poetess, for indeed that is what you are :)

(gives you a hell-yeah) and a 5 ;)

chasingtheday The PoetBay support member heart!
smiling - you should be proud, i know you have wanted to have a go at the forms for a long time now, i am glad i could persuade you to do so :)