shows energy building something that will build on itself. its the ultimite creation, in the eye of god or maybe the third eye, come back and explain more maybe later


The Almighty Architect's Perspective

As I Free hand life into three dimensions
Matter morphing and molding
I feel the power as I act as the almighty architect
Mountains form with swift gusts of power
Ocean's form from gas
Fierce storms of clouds come with a tremble heard across many lands
I mold rivers, lakes, and streams, slowly turning them into ice
Inside my mind I see an origin that creates itself
With Essence in mind,
It's what I'll bring to the earth
My Ideal needs something for it to make itself invincible
Carefully I planted my environment to work together
Quickly geosphere combined, with the hydrosphere
Increasingly it merged together to grow into the atmosphere
Prepared now for final touch,
With production it brings much sensation
For I give the world a conscience for decisions
So I can watch what I crafted, construct itself




Poetry by cory Crook
Read 525 times
Written on 2005-09-29 at 11:59

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John Ashleigh
Well written, but like your last comment had said, I think you should deffinetly structure your poem better and shorten the lines. Don't do it for the sites benefit though. Good work though.
2005-09-29


chasingtheday The PoetBay support member heart!
i would suggest breaking the lines a little as the borders in the site are not that long and so longer lines get thrown to a next line.

please take the time to visit others in the site and leave thoughts on work?

creation, a tricky one for sure to get inside the midn of god. a good piece.
2005-09-29