uma
then
i write this letter
to let him know how beatiful poem he has written
2007-12-09

Kathy Lockhart
the irony is brilliant. well done Chris!
2007-12-04

night soul woman
This is indeed brilliant! This is how it all begun. . . Can it be that this is what the bible is talking about? (when Eve ate the fruit from the tree of knowledge? ) can it be that it was a metaphor? like you write on your poem?
the man killed a bird
so that he could make
a quill from its long tail feather

Thank you for this thought - provoking poem!
2006-12-11

SweetestAngel
Wow... that's like, so good!
People should read poems like this one, and think about it in every day life...

Love it.
2006-12-10

TheLine
This is brilliant. The the message and the structure is really great. It really feels like this poem has something to say. My poem "Jar o' Flies" is about just the same thing, same message, or least I guess.
2006-12-10

Teala
Excellent--this is a very moving piece..it is ironic.. you should read my poem "Savage"..it is similar in meaning:)
2006-12-09

Zachary P. B.
so sad, so true... good perception, and great flow.. the format was excellent.. just one idea/comment - perhaps you shouldn't have the "then" before the first stanza because that's the first step isn't it? unless you did that purposefully which i can see why.

good job,
z
2006-12-09

Wangdi Gyalpo
Bravo! Liked you idea of portraying human's flaw and hupocracy through your simple poem. Your work of art sounds genuine and authentic.

Bon Voyage
2006-12-08

Kathy Lockhart
brilliant! I love the message, the structure, the flow of this piece Chris.
2006-12-07

BlueyedSoul
One of the best things I have read in a long time Chris. I always love creativity in poetry and all the better when it raise one's consciousness. This certainly hits the mark. Astounding imagery; excellent.

*bookmarked*

~Blue
2006-12-06

wow, this is great, it is a thought provoker, i liked it a lot. Nice twist in the end it personifies this world
2006-12-06