Mom this is still not enough -

A letter to my mother

Mother's Day has come and gone. We spent some time together. But did I give you anything worth while? Did I give you what you deserved. No. I did not honor you as I should have.
Now, with death so fresh in our minds and hearts I have thought about Mother's Day and what I should have done.
What I should have done is talked to you. No, not chit-chat, not small talk, not the faded worn out day to day niceties. What I needed to do and will do now is tell you that I love you.
I did not utter those words on Mother's Day and looking back on it now, it mortifies me. How could I spend a entire day with you, a day dedicated to honoring you and not tell you that I love you?
Well, mom, I love you.
I love you.
I love what you have taught me and I love all that you have done for me. I love what you continue to do for me. You are always there for me. How many times have I called you at the last minute for help? I am almost ashamed to think of how often. You don't complain, you don't condemn, you do what you can to help. What a blessing and a gift that is. The sacrifices you have made for me are immeasurable. Where would I be right now if you had not made them. The selflessness that you have shown is a testament to motherhood.
You have given so much, dealt with so much and been hurt so much while raising me. Although I am going to be 34 very soon, I do know you are still raising me. You are raising me up in the ways of being a wonderful wife and mother myself. You still teach me, you still have so much to give and I am eagerly learning.
That intelligent, young mind of yours has always been one of the things that I adore the most about you.
You have given me such fantastic and precious memories too.
I remember dancing in the living room. You would turn on an oldies station and dance with us! How wonderful I thought that was and when I think of it today, my heart warms. You showed me how to move like James Brown and how to do the Jerk like no other little kid around. You gave me the world of music and taught me to enjoy it all.
You explained the world of drag racing to me. You showed me that writing is an art and what a talented writer looks like in yourself. You taught me to love books. This is one of your most precious gifts you have given to me. I can not imagine my life with out these things. You introduced me to Big Red and putting mustard on potato chips. I still love both to this day!
Finally mom, you told me about God. That lesson wasn't one I learned easily or that took early. The seeds you planted when I was a child stayed and today they have blossomed. That lesson, that love of God you told me about is now the bedrock of my life. I know that it literally saved my life and in turn saved my family. Where would I be if I you wouldn't have loved God enough and me enough to tell me of his Grace.
You never gave up. No matter what terrible thing I said or did, you never gave up. No matter how dark it got, you never gave up. You loved and loved and loved....
So, I must say this
Mommy, thank you.
Mommy, I love you!

Words by Jessica Rexroat
Read 1096 times
Written on 2008-05-17 at 07:12

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Phyllis J. Rhodes
Oh wow, how wonderful to read this again!!! Wish I had gotten on here sooner to see it. It just blows me away! Thank you so much you sweet wonderful child!!

Now you must remember to do the same for Valerie!


P.S. This is still a wonderful piece, and I still love it.

Hi Jessica,
I know that Phyllis is very much impressed by this write as any nomal caring Mom would be. I see that the two of you have a very loving relationship--something that many moms only dream about having with their daughters.

You must be one special lady to write this for your mom and put it on the internet for the entire world to read.

Great work!

Phyllis J. Rhodes
My sweet darling daughter, thank you so much. You have blessed my heart with your words. So much love comes from them. They hold wonderful surprises in the moments and memories you describe that touched your life. I had no idea all those little things would impact your life, much less be important to you. I am so proud of you. You have so many talents and you are such a good human being. God blessed me greatly when he gave me you!