Torn




How did you know when to call?
It was almost like you knew
When I would be at my most vunerable
My defenses weakened by a recent battle
My resolve not quite as strong as it was
The call I waited eight months for,
Shatters the silence of an empty room

What was I to say, after all?
I replay the conversation in my head
Hear the thickness of alcohol in your voice
But still so familiar it brings me to tears
The sound of the one that broke my heart
Telling me his mother is dying of cancer
I want to cry, laugh, scream, all at once

How can I be there for you?
I am trying to mend my shattered life
Stand alone, on my own two feet
I hear your sadness and regret
But I have grown so much my friend
I feel your pain, as I feel my own
My instinct tells me to protect myself

How can I shut you out?
When I know you need me right now
Still somehow, I know I must
I will always love you, always did
Survival tells me to beware, take care
I remember how much it hurt to lose you
I want to be there, I'm sorry, but

I can't




Poetry by Purple Phoenix
Read 549 times
Written on 2009-04-25 at 06:25

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Rob Graber
Wow, a poignant write. He did not know what he had--or at least thought he did not want/need it--'til the going got tough. For what it's worth, I'd say the narrator handled this very wisely.
2009-04-25


melanie sue
I agree, this is very well penned. It is sad too, but at least honest in knowing you are emotionally drained in this situation. I felt the sense of your pain and dilemma in this expression, it is so very well written.
2009-04-25



Well penned description of conflicting feelings and an incident we can all relate to. I think sometimes people don't realize (or don't care) how cruel it is to ask someone who still has strong emotional attachments to them to sympathize and "be there" for them. It's a selfish act and I probably would have felt exactly the way you do.

William
2009-04-25


TonyD
Beautifully written poem of a very hard decision to make. Looks like you made the right choice.
2009-04-25


Kathy Lockhart
very eloquently written with a touch of sadness and abounding in strength. your words dear one come very near my heart.
2009-04-25