Sequel to "Not a Whiny Brat" that first please.

Not a Whiny Brat 2: To live

I'm calmed down after writing that piece. And I want to clear things up. For those of you who've ever felt suicidal, you probably sat there thinking "Ok...she why doesn't she kill herself if she hates herself?"


Even if I am seeing all these flaws, there are times when I can see the good qualities. There are points when I can see the hope. When I can see beyond all this and I know I can't die. I just can't do that to people.

Yes, I'll admit. There are times when I've thought about suicide. But I wouldn't do it. Not because I don't have the guts. Because I'd regret it. I'd regret everything I would miss, I'd regret the friends I hurt, I'd regret the family members I hurt. I would regret it. My mother has told me twice to kill myself. I've wondered "What would she say if I actually did?" But the truth is, I really don't want to know that. Why throw my entire life, which I've barely lived, away just because I want to know her reaction?

So, I'm, sitting here
And I'm finally knowing
I want to live.

I honestly, truely want to live.

Diary by Marie
Read 591 times
Written on 2006-02-27 at 04:56

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