Nature seems to suit my style lately. - 17th August 2011.


Solace.

Solace in unison;
Hatred banished.
Deer roam lovingly whilst
Archaic mines rot -
Fetid and forgotten.

Serene life;
Plentiful and wise.
Polished, grown,
Yet still chastised.

South facing sun;
Dry and withered.
Hawk glides with splendor
as tracks painted rust -
Origin now trusted.

Ravine deep;
Mystery of old.
Nature with a heart,
Nature we're told.




Poetry by John Ashleigh
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Written on 2011-08-17 at 22:25

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ken d williams The PoetBay support member heart!
Well written , and well exprest , good use of words. Well dun John.
Ken
2011-09-01


jenks The PoetBay support member heart!
You are getting very much better.
2011-08-18



I really like the partial rhymes 'rot/forgotten'; wise/chastised; rust/trusted.

Original and pleasing.
2011-08-18



'OE!' 'JA!' Such memories, eh?
John, I am truly delighted to see you here. And what a fresh new beginning tonight. Your vision is similar to that of c/f; and as such, resembles my own modest endeavour.
The structure works well, moving with ease through each new theme. And there's a beautiful balance, which resonates well with me since I am a Libran in all respects.
I couldn't choose a favourite stanza as each has so much to recommend it. But perhaps the last has particular strength in its allusion to mystery, key to existence, paradoxical though that may seem...
2011-08-17