Today I love you

Today, I waited for a sign,
a whisper, a word, that you cared.

Today, I again looked at the long hours,
thinking that they served you well,
never reminding you of me,
and you never giving me one minute of your day.
I wondered why I think of you each passing moment,
your scorn and wrath the only thing I endure at the end.

How you twisted my heart and my life,
rendering my feelings useless,
claiming you have better things to do than being there for me.
I only asked for one moment of your day,
a caring word or presence,
a sign that I mattered to you.
Alas, the only thing I got was your deafening silence.
Proof that my love was worthless for you.

Today, I wait yet again,
knowing that you would be in touch if you wanted to,
knowing that your love has gone cold.

Today, you are the one I rush to,
the one I expect to soothe my fears and insecurities.
How painful is the burden on my heart while I brush away my tears,
knowing that for you, they are only signs of weakness.

Today you have made a mockery of my love for you,
pushing me away for fear I would disturb your peace,
my presence unnecessary to your life,
my needs unimportant to you.

Today I realize you have made a joke of my life,
casting me away as you wish,
unveiling me to shun me away once more.
I thought love required to be there for that person,
through good and bad times.
Alas, you proved again that in bad times,
I suffer through them alone, no hope of your help.

If this is love for you, I am proud that mine is true and stronger.
You claim to love me yet you do not know how be true to love.
How broken I already was and how shattered I am today.

Yet, Today I love you, stronger than ever,
never asking for anything more from you except your time.
I, on the other sacrificed so many things for you,
things that you now take for granted.

Yes, Today I love you,
but you no longer care.

Tomorrow, maybe you would care or maybe not.
but then, who knows if tomorrow I will be in the same place,
looking at the long hours and wishing you would love me.




Poetry by myst_ery
Read 656 times
Written on 2014-07-20 at 13:59

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This is a very sad poem. How long is it possible to love while being rejected? I do understand what a strong hold love can have on a person's needs, yet a time must come when it starts to wane and eventually dissolve into memories. "Today I love you," to me indicates that there might be days when you don't.
I think it's getting closer to becoming a memory than you realize.
The poem is romantic and heartbreaking and lovely to read.
2014-07-20