Just a dream I have had once


Dream

I want a big house
I want to listen the music around
I want to play with my thoughts
I want to dance
I want to wait
For you inside
I want to see the ocean down
I want to take a bath
Naked delighting in the waves
Which are caressing me in the sunrise light
And I want to come back
To our great bed
When you are just waked up
My man
I love you then
And you are
With me again





Poetry by anna3
Read 644 times
Written on 2005-08-26 at 15:52

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Individuality
ah i remember this piece :) naked in the waves, on a cool summer night sounds good - keep dancing anna.
2007-02-24


chasingtheday The PoetBay support member heart!
hi anna, a nice poem, i have made some suggestions for you, to either take or leave :) i felt the piece was a little too repetitive, so have edited it a little, i know you do not mind this as you ahve said to me before so... so below is how i think it would read better.

I want
A big house,
To listen to the music around,
Play with my thoughts.

I want
To dance,
Wait for you inside,
See the ocean down.

I want to take a bath,
Naked delighting in the waves
Which are caressing me
In the sunrise light
And I want to come back
To our great bed
When you just wake up,
My man
I love you
And you are
With me again
2005-08-26