A Day at the Orifice - Tranche Two
The office was animated this morning – Loony Ham, VP of Not Very Much was bouncing around like a pin-ball stuttering commands while her face contorted and leapt around like a bag of frogs being electrocuted.Suddenly she screams, her hands thrown up into the air as she loses all control in an ecstasy of pleasure – the XML message had successfully posted to the database. "Wow!!" she says in total amazement that it had actually worked and confused as to why it had. She screams into the Data Base Administrator's ear "Only 4000 more message errors to correct!" Her body shivers in anticipation while her face drops into an agony of depression punctuated by a nervous laugh. Her hands shake the papers they hold as if to force an answer out of them – but they only respond by trashing around.
The noise of her falling apart does not go unnoticed by the DBA, Mr.Chang-Bar, sitting in front of her – his eyes narrow and move imperceptibly as the glowing monitor spews out the result set of his latest SQL script. He turns ever so slightly and his dead stare takes a moment off from the screen to penetrate, like a cold knife into Loony Ham's being. "What the fuck was she doing, if only he could grab that stupid neck and throttle the life out of this nitwit – maybe he would get some peace. After 60 hours in front of this fucking screen he would love to slice those eyelids off and watch her eyes dry out – oh what a pleasure that would be – instead he announces to her that the stored procedure would have to be changed again to allow the carrier view of associated equipment to work properly.
For a moment, the waving of thousands of Little Red Books held in thousands of hands marching passed a giant poster of the beloved Chairman, revolves in Chang-Bar's inner mind. A thought like a pop-up window forces itself upon him. "The flattery of the bourgeoisie may conquer the weak-willed in our ranks". The window closes and the screen flickers
Short story by Firehawk
Read 737 times
Written on 2005-10-04 at 02:12
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