how i felt 4 weeks ago

I miss you

I miss you more then you know
time seems to go so slow

minuets feel like years
amplifying all my fears

Will I ever get to see you again

I miss you more then you know
the thought of you just won't go

I can't fall asleep
little images if you seem to creep

I wish I could get you out my head

I miss you more then I can take
some days I just want to excape

form every one and every thing
I just want my heart to sing

I'm so unhappy and I been here awhile

I miss you more then I can take
my life feels so fake

nothings real with out you
but what else can i do

I just...... I just.......I just

miss you

Poetry by philip reis
Read 833 times
Written on 2009-07-16 at 01:30

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Doreen Cavazza
I feel your pain. This brings about emotions that are close to the heart. The longing and the pain are clearly expressed here. There were a few mechanical things I noticed that can be corrected, and I hope you don't mind if I point them out. This is a piece that many can relate to. Nice job.

I think you mean minutes being as of time, not music.
Also, 'excape' is spelled 'escape'.

"I'm so unhappy and I been here awhile"
Should be ...I've been here....

"nothings real with out you"
should be nothing's (since this is the contraction of nothing is) and 'without' should be one word.

"but what else can i do"
Capitalize the I.

Sad but beautiful!! great write

Amy Valentina
It's so difficult to express things like missing someone.... And you did it so beautifully...
Missing some one right from the deepest core of your heart...
Keep writing,

A sad poem of yearning. Your pain is conveyed by your words, and i'm sure that we all know how you feel. (Or felt, 4 weeks ago.) I do hope that you are moving on, at the time it's like the end of the world, but amazingly, it does get better.