Losing a mate of 39 years isn't easy. This is my account of losing mine.


Cancer Took Her!

Carolyn, my wife was my life for 39+ years, but on March 13, 2010, her life came to an end. We used a family doctor in Conway, Arkansas. A few years ago, I sensed something in the doctor's attitude and quit using him. My daughter and I both began using another doctor in the same office. I tried to get Carolyn to use the other doctor as well, but she wouldn't change and said, "I believe that he is still a good doctor."
About a year before she died, she went to Dr. Smith again and told him something was wrong. He is one of those doctors that likes for his patients to tell him, I think I am getting the flu or some other such statement like that so he can write out a prescription for what ails you and go on to the next patient and make more money. He told Carolyn that nothing was wrong with her after doing some small test. A month or so later she was back telling him again that something was wrong. Again, he did a test and repeated that nothing was wrong with her. This happened a few times--I don't remember the exact number.
One day Carolyn told me that she was going to a new doctor. I can't remember who it was or what kind of doctor it was, but whoever it was wanted her to see a cancer doctor. On the day she had to go see the cancer doctor she told me; although, I don't have a clue how she knew that she would have to go to the hospital and she said--"And I won't be coming home this time." I knew that she was sick because she wasn't the kind of person to put on, but I had no idea that she thought she was that bad off.
We went to see the cancer doctor, and he gave us some papers to take to Dr. Smith. Dr. Lander read them then indignantly said, "How come I didn't know about this?"
I thought, "You ignorant bastard--You didn't know because you don't listen to what your patients tell you." That was on February 16, 2010 and before that night came she was in the hospital having tests run to check for cancer.
Carolyn told me when getting ready to go to the doctor in February that she wouldn't be coming home, and she never got out of the hospital. Her cancer doctor found that she had liver cancer and had had it for six months or more. The cancer took her from me on March 13, 2010.
Later in the year, I met another woman who lost her husband to cancer a number of years ago. Now we plan to spend the rest of our lives together, so I guess you could say that cancer took Carolyn from me; however, it also brought a new lady into my life.




Essay by Damon
Read 935 times
Written on 2011-01-15 at 06:36

Tags Mourning  Sad 

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