This numbness inside

Being me ain't easy,
just to have parents is great,
to have a house is wonderful
but having half a heart?

So, my hearts been broken a couple of times,
and the trouble is...
it's staying that way!

I've tried dating other guys,
tried to laugh it off,
but nothing changes...

How can I fix my heart?
How will I get it right?

Losing the one I loved
did hurt,
but not being able to feel anymore
hurts much more!

How can I say
and pretend to be happy
when I'm not able to feel anything?
When all I feel inside
is the emptiness,
this void,
this numbness!

I don't know why I bother anymore...
I don't even feel alive

My heart still beats blood,
I still walk around,
but being dead inside!?
That's not life for me!

I wish I could feel something,
but it seems I lost the ability to feel
and to love.

I try to laugh from my soul,
but I need to have one first.
I try to say: "I love you"
but those words are empty and fake!
I want to say: "I miss you"
but there's no one to miss
and no one to love!

Everyday I lose a bit of my sanity,
I become more insane,
I turn into someone else!

I know that I'm missing something...
and I'm searching for it,
but it seems that my search
is a waste of my time and I don't
think I'll find myself in time....

Poetry by Surei
Read 697 times
Written on 2006-04-01 at 13:17

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Zoya Zaidi
Dear Surie,
A heart rending piece, very well expressed, very well indeed!
the feeling of numbness,
I cabn understand, that is how
it happens, when pain is too much
to stand! When the soul feels empty
of all feelings good and bad,
When night loooks gloomy,
When days you cannot stand!!

((((Hugs for a really perfect write))))

LOve, xxx, Zoya

Rik The PoetBay support member heart!
A very poignant and moving piece. But do wait because there is always time. We collect moments, some good and some not so good and some are extraordinary. And when those extraordinary moments come, everything past, present and future will succumb. All you have to do is be around to experience it. A very good read.