F.i.in.e Moods

- ;) ... while figuring out the form (which I didn't find too obvious), these are the lines that came to me... 

I took a few days to mull it over

Still think it'll be tricky for good results!

So I tried this, and I even tried that

All sounded too gimmicky for good results!

A capricious little form this one is

One'd say, most finnicky for good results!

'Cause look at all I could manage so far

Poor thing's all clunky; not good results!

So, I, Ms. Moods, must concede defeat

Am too much of a rookie for good results!

- in-laws... 

The conversation started on the wrong foot for me

When she said, "I've been made to feel..."

Speaking to the both of us about how we're

Not involved enough with her unreasonable wishes.

I, a new member of the family, couldn't sit idly by,

And not instantly reply, "What do you mean you've

Been made to feel?", clearly not accepting we did

Anything to make it happen.  And that stunned her.

And she blubbered something to the effect that

It's just an expression I wouldn't understand

Because I'm French - it's something they say.

I don't know, "I've been made" implies strongly

That we did something to provoke an emotion,

And since she was complaining, the implication

Was obvious that she was dissatisfied we didn't

Jump through her hoops and loops to make her happy.

Clearly unsettled that I didn't sit idly by as she's used to,

I looked at her - and from what I'm told, my face 

Speaks volumes - and she did what she mustn't have done

In decades : she shut the hell up.  Not happy, but finally quiet.

- couldn't afford a 25$/month rent increase at renewal of my lease this July (ma douce moitié isn't allowed to work without a work permit, which has been stalling for 16 months now!) ... made an agreement understanding our circumstances... but now the owner sent a letter demanding 30$ extra on the rent for June to September (120$)... for electricity that is part of my rent... has always been for the last 16 years... grrrr... sorry, rant...

I so wish I could say

that I'm as happy as a lark

tiptoeing through the tulips

(as Tiny Tim once put it)

but it's sadly not true.

There's really nothing

this week that's making a

good, calm impression

on my stretched nerves.

It keeps coming.

Latest one, an unexpected

requirement of payment

for electricity at my place!

Apparently, due to an elevated

usage of ventilators, the terms of

my 16-year lease no longer stand!

What the hell?  In his notice,

he says it's in my terms.

It absolutely is not!

No mention of that anywhere...

Really don't know where he's pulling

that from, but it sure looks like his hm.

And this is after he already

knows about the out of our hands

situation with the bureaucratic

fiasco we're truly well stuck in, even

making an agreement with us for it.

And then he slaps this surprise gem!

Again, what the hell?

Another fight to take on.

At this point I just want to cry.

So exhausted,

Feeling invaded.

It's getting hard to find my center.

Mr. & Mrs. C. are going through a lot

so many hurdles to jump, so little peace

and plenty of stress born out of nonsense

they seemingly always run up against

It's so discouraging, disheartening

everything you can think of that's high stress

They're so tired, doing the right thing

constantly proves will never benefit them

They're not asking for much

'cause they really don't need much

But apparently, going by how it's going

their simple dreams aren't worthy enough

So, they wait, as they're forced to

while their ribs become more and more visible

'cause no one gives a flying rat's rump

to fix the mistakes they created for them!

Mr. & Mrs. C., they're hanging in there

but their faith more than dwindling now

Every step, a most unnecessary fight

filled with unspeakable frustrations

And you know what their dream is?

They just want to be home together

-  desfois c'est décourageant...

J'suis rendue au point

de baisser les bras

et de librement dire:

« Qu'est-ce que tu veux faire ? »

On changera pas le monde

aujourd'hui, ni demain. 

Bêtement dit, c'est pas

mal ça qui est ça...

Y'a personne

pour personne.

Alors, arrête de chigner,

c'est chacun pour soi.

Pas comme si

c'était une nouvelle.

rough translation...

- sometimes it's discouraging...

I'm at the point
of giving up

and freely saying:

"What do you want to do ?"

We won't change the world
today, nor tomorrow.

Crudely put, it pretty
much is what it is...

There's no one
for anyone.

So, stop your whining,
it's every man for himself.

Not like
it was news.

- my second baby is now a young man... taking his first steps in the direction he wants to take his life... a lot of exciting things going on for him, and I'm over the moon happy for him... 

Whenever I see this picture,

my heart melts as much as

on the day you paddled over

to the side of the pool for this

impromptu kiss of sweetness.

My, how time has gone quickly!

But here were are, you're a fine

young man, and you're on your

way in the direction you wish

to take your life - it's begun.

A place of your own, a job to

take care of all these "adult"

things all must at one time or

another begin to manage, and

a promising career in waiting.

Basic training about to begin

finally after all these months of

waiting during this virus crisis.

When you called me to tell me the

great news, been giddy ever since.

You sound so happy, and so

ready to take it all on.  Your

enthusiasm and excitement

very palpable, making me

feel ecstactic for all this good.

You've had to fight so hard

to get to where you've arrived.

But I always knew that you

could - just by your caring

nature about what's important.

Pushing through anything,

you have proven time and again

to yourself that you are capable

of achieving what you want. The

pool one a perfect first example.

I remember how everything

was so much hardship, how

discouraged and frustrated

you would feel about it all.

But with time, all the efforts

which you had to put in, started to

yield a small place for victories.

And as time went on, they became

more and more frequent, until these

efforts weren't needed anymore.

It's without any doubt in my mind

that I know you'll carry on this way.

My sweet, caring son, with a darling

heart, I'm so very happy for you. How

I adore you, you know I always will.

Although you're a young man now, and

those little cheeks aren't as prevalent

as they most adorably once were,

you'll nonetheless always remain

« Ma belle p'tite face »  (wink)

Silence, deafeningly echoes

Disturbing all peace

While the crickets' chirps join in

- Collaborations used to be fairly frequent on PoetBay some years ago now... and I've been missing them.  So, I asked Thomas if he had a line he liked, but could never lead anywhere.  He sent me this one line: "the million calamitous jewels of a wrecked windshield", and this is where it led us. Thanks Thomas, this was an awful lot of fun!

Like an effect
of a million calamitous
jewel-like bits of a shattered
windshield strewn
about on a hot pavement
in a strong sun,
the glimmering specks of
light on the snowflakes’ tips
illuminated the clearing all around.

*

This snowscape is hard,
glassy with unyielding light:
sequined with specks of blue,
bristly with spikes of ice.
What language
can describe the scene?
Something runic and northern,
an alphabet of thorns
encased in frost.

*

And as the cold creeps in,

never the subtle visitor,

the Northern heart knows 

too well its language,

but ever forsaking it, 

is simply unforeseeable,

'cause where else would

we be able to behold such

complex beauty?

- for my douce moitié... 

//   About a life without compared to the opposite

if ($you == 0  OR  $you_and_me  !=  1) {

      $result = trim($life_makes_sense);
      $furthermore = $i_fall_apart;

} else {

      $best_world = TRUE;
      $luckiest_girl_on_planet = TRUE;

}

'Equal' (==)

Not equal (!=)

- can't concentrate to write much lately (or comment - sorry about that to all who have left me comments recently; I'll be by your page soon!), so decided to start a clean up in my account to see what's in there... I have hundreds of unpublished and never published texts in my archive... it's getting a little ridiculous... this one is also a never published draft that I found in there... not really sure why I like it, but I do... strike any particular thoughts for you?

Maybe time'll finally commandeer

All that you keep and hold so dear

It’s the constant, never ending saga

Which’ll no doubt leave us all gaga 

Sensations beyond understanding

Maybe now's the time for a lashing

Perhaps I'll also scratch a letter

And manage to prompt a wonder

Who knows for sure at this point

I expect answers would disappoint

Maybe you don't strut your stuff

And by then I'll have had enough

Furthermore, I'll kill you softly

Like one of those songs so weepy

Allow me, dear, my nevertheless

And see it, I'll always feel blessed