F.i.in.e Moods

- a fleeting thought that pops in mind once in a rare while even though the need for an answer is long gone...

I wonder sometimes

If you ever have a moment

Outside of avoidance

When you can clearly see

The impacts

You had on us children

Whose growing up

Experience was you...

- so boring when it happens... obviously, this isn't directed at anyone here... I find it cute when it stems from caring... very much less tolerable when it stems from misogyny... my brain cells always want to jump off a cliff then... 

But I can't promise I'll be attentively listening 'cause,

You know,

I have better things in mind for my brain today?

Just sayin'.

- thank you all for your kind comments on my last posts... my health's in poor shape and I can't concentrate, so I will be by your page as soon as I feel better... today was an absolute horrible day all around and I need a break too...

Never imagined that the people I love the most on this planet

Would turn out to make me feel the most insignificant as can be

- reconciling the idea that there's a plan with all of what life has been like to this point is a very hard sell... no disrespect to my religious friends, of course... it's only a topic which doesn't make me happy or comfortable for my personal life...

Jesus!  I swear to your dad (ha ha),

If the two of you should actually exist,

And for some reason we get to meet,

I'll sock both of you right in the kisser!

You imaginative psychopaths!

- when the medecine will make you sicker before better... a common occurrence in the current treatments available... 

Apparently, this is normal...

You'll have to get more sick first

Before you can get well again

But you'll have other medecines

To counteract the effects of this one

And so on, if these others affect too

It'll all be well in the end, you'll see

Well, that's mighty reassuring...

- extreme weather events are more than passed the point of being a clue... hm...

As the Brits would say :

Fucking hell!

Still not convinced

After that ? ? ?

Promise of relief, peace,

A wearying elusiveness

With no beginning, no end,

And never any prospects.

A recurring dead end

Which will only follow

For as long as breath'll

Flow in this tiredness...

- repost... once in a while, a poetry form for a personal challenge...

Rhopalic verse:  

with each line, the first word is one syllable, the second word two syllables, the third word three syllables, etc.

Schemed quiet divisions:  intricacies
Of unfelt commanding forgetfulness. 
The chartered underworlds, unyieldingly,
Now restrain overfilled expectations.

Hopes, heartaches, fantasies
Dance beside projection,
And within disbelief intensified,
Their simple existence disassembles.

- admittedly, only my friends will understand this one... I'm of course goofin' ;)

The biggest

disappointment

in my life? Hm.

Well, I'll never be able to

have a company using

my own initials?

- of course poetry is a very nice artful thing, but my writing has never been that or has it ever been presented as being that either... 

Writing has always been a way for me :

To process ;

To explain ;

To word out the unwordable ;

To try to make sense of the senseless seen or lived.

When life's circumstances were or are simply too overwhelming ;

When the painful anguish's enough to make you want to quit ;

When there are no recourses or solutions but only time for 'healing' ;

When isolated 'cause talking of horrors causes inevitable discomfort.

I don't write so much about these things anymore,

'Cause life has found a way to improve and move on.

But the processing still remains a big part of it all,

And I really don't know how I'd have coped without.

Writing has always been there for me through it all.